Wednesday, February 4, 2009

I fold in half so easily when I put myself in the picture of success

I have a week left here and I am trying to breathe everything in before my heart freezes. I try to arrange my thoughts delicately so I don't flood my mind with pain. I read the Conference talk "Joy in the Journey" and felt gratified that the prophet felt the same about "Our Town" that I did...it's hard to fully appreciate the moments when you're in the middle of them, even if you really want to, it's when you see the painting on the wall and realize it doesn't belong to you in the same way anymore that you understand how precious it all was.

What feels amazing is the successful interchange of monedas and climbing on the bus, people in the market who know me now, in Juconi, so many open arms, so many beaming faces. I just live here, I have a best friend and places to go and people who love me and it's all a world I carved out in the last 5 months. This was a dream I dreamed for myself and my life really is so young but it's felt so full to me. I have been so blessed. This is what I found in the sunlight that surrounds me. I will be so grateful for all of these days, and I will be grateful for a new adventure to pour my life into.











This is the largest statue of the Virgen that exists in the world (Chignahuapan, Puebla). She is amazingly, massively gorgeous! Her big toe is about the size of my torso. There is a little staircase and you can climb around in back of her...the wall behind her is covered with names and pleas scribbled on the wall, like the "eloquent" graffiti on the pearly gates. "Senora ruega por nosotros..." I wanted to read everything but Lupita wouldn't let me. I understood that they were fragments of soul. That was why I wanted to read. I know I had a vendetta against the Virgen on my mission, but I feel sort of like I'm friends with her now.

Bendita eres tu entre las mujeres...

Adam and Eve are huddled in the folds of the Virgen's skirt...

...hiding from him...



The beloved Hermano Sergio

With Lupita Sunday morning by the waterfalls

Isai dancing with his little cousin at Ilan's pachanga

In Mexico City con mi chilangito





Sweet note from one of the Casa Juconi boys. I love being Recher almost as much as I love being Morena. :)



In so many churches the Lord is huddled in a coffin like this, all weak and broken. I don't like to think of Him that way, I think we're supposed to remember He left us gazing up into Heaven.

This is part of a trail we climb to visit one of the families in TRACA. I don't want to forget.

Chignahuapan and the mist covered mountains















This Wincho and he has my heart

Wincho's front yard



Gaby helping her father spell something

Isai helping me with my GOTH









Isai's parents getting their dance on











Isai's "tios inicuos" who offered me tequila and were spectacularly good company




Going to the mountain of the Lord in Mexico City



I took this from the back of the motorcycle going about 90 mph









Waiting for the bus at the end of temple day































I love it here.

6 comments:

ls said...

oh, how will you ever leave?? you will need about 8 closure assignments to work through all the joy and sorrow you are leaving behind next week. call me once you settle back into life here again and maybe i can help you keep your heart from freezing :).

ls said...

p.s. if you start missing all your little boys too much you can come find the one who lives at my house. you'll have to paint his face brown and put some stilts on him, but i think you could come to love him all the same.

squirrelyearl said...

You look pretty hard there behind the wheel of a bumper car. I can imagine you were vicious.

Brenda K. said...

Rachel you have some pretty amazing pictures. Isn't it so the truth that you never really appreciate something until its gone, as hard as you try, its just different. Of course, I think you are doing a great job, because you know how it is. No one will ever appreciate this experience the way you will, the pictures, the stories, but its worth recording them all the same. Thank you so much for your note the other day. I was really worried. Have a fabulous week! Love ya!

Dan Heintz said...

What a special experience for you. You'll be able to carry so much of it with you through the rest of your life. Welcome home!! (in a few days...) :)

Tanya said...

Thanks for sharing your experience with the rest of us. I feel like I've lived it a little bit too just by reading what you've blogged and seeing the poignant pictures. I'm going to miss your amazing posts. But I'm sure you will find something else equally amazing to write about. You remind me of a quote on my sister's blog. It says: "I have never thought of writing for reputation and honor. What I have in my heart must come out; that is the reason why I compose." Ludwig van Beethoven